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5 Lies Mamas Tell Themselves About Why They Can't Write Their Books





Original Post written as a Guest Blog for Novel's Live to appear on 12/10/20. (Oooh, I'm like Cinderella waiting for her fancy dress!)


As someone who has spent my life writing for everything from television, big blogs (Good Housekeeping/BabyCenter), huge corporations, magazines and newspapers, I knew at a very early age that writing was my gift. It was absolutely thrilling to use these gifts as an adult to support myself, plan my wedding and simply delight in my job every single day. But I was never more proud than when my first book, Happily Ticked Off (about my journey with my son’s Tourette Syndrome) was picked up by a small publishing house.


Residuals Vs. Royalties


The $10,000 checks I’d receive for a TV script in my thirties somehow did not excite me as much as the significantly smaller royalty checks I’d received for that book years later. Why? Because my book, much more than the ego of TV, was directly aligned with my passion and my purpose. It was the first project I had picked up after letting my writing dreams die for a bit when I thought parenting and being a wife took precedence over my first love.





This beautiful book was the product not just of a hope to follow my dreams. It was the product of a decision I made to listen to my soul’s calling despite my fears barking at me that I was being selfish… that good moms don’t put their kids in front of the TV an hour a day to “putter” at the keyboard. (Yeah, that inner voice can be a real bitch.) As it turns out, “sane moms” do exactly that, and it was a gamble worth taking.


It turns out, in carving out time for my passion, I was more present to my kids than I was before I started writing again. Instead of being tired and naggy I transformed in front of their very eyes as the most authentic, real and content Andrea I could be.


In addition to living as my true self again, the knowledge that my book was making a lasting impact on other women struggling with their kids’ diagnosis made my soul sing. It filled me with satisfaction that no applause from the television studio audience could compare with.

“I want to write a book, too!” so many of my inspired readers would confide in me with joy. But just as quickly their spirits would drop, “But I just don’t think I can.”


I could see the pain in their eyes when we’d meet in person at a book signing. I’d sense the longing through the emails they’d send… the desire they kept under the laundry basket… beneath the pile of dirty dishes… pushed to the side for more fancy corporate jobs or “practical” jobs that paid the bills but ultimately left them feeling miserable.


I knew that, like me, as long as these aspiring authors did everything but what they were put on this earth to do, they would be unfulfilled. They would, like I had, leak their disappointment out onto the people they loved most – perhaps their very own children and grandchildren. (Because how could they honestly tell their kids and grandkids to live their best lives if they weren’t living theirs?)


Being true to oneself and one’s dreams takes courage, and I knew, due to my own experience, I was the expert on this adventure. Armed with the passion to help other women break through their mind blocks, I made a decision that my desire to follow my gut trumped my fear of failure. Enter my latest book: Write Like a Mother.


In this self-publication (self-pubs make way more cash, people!) I share with moms and grandmothers everywhere the five key lies that are keeping them from writing their life changing book.

Five Key Lies Mamas Tell Themselves About Why They Can't Write Their Book


  1. I'm Not a Qualified Writer

  2. 2. It’s Been Done Before

  3. My Book Will Be a Failure

  4. It’s Self Indulgent

  5. I Don’t Have Time to Write


Break Free from the Lies and Write Like a Mother


Small but mighty, this powerful guide serves as a road map for aspiring female authors everywhere to break down these lies for the nasty little beasts they are. I remind them to take a look at what their excuses really are. I ask, “What if I told you that those excuses are just symptoms of bigger lies you have chosen to believe out of fear... lies that are choking your life-changing story from being read by the world?”


I continue, “What if I told you the REAL reason you’re not writing your book has nothing to do with the rationalizations stated above and has everything to do with one lie you keep telling yourself: ‘My Story Doesn’t Matter.’” As a cherry on the top of this truth, I add, “Hiding waaaay at the bottom of the ‘My Story Doesn’t Matter’ lie is a bigger, more sinister, hairy, scary lie that is the true reason you aren’t writing your book. It's the lie hiding within your own subconscious mindset, sinisterly whispering to you: ‘I Myself Don’t Matter.’”


I remind these mamas, as I am reminding you and all my coaching clients, that “I can bug you until I’m blue in the face that YOU MATTER. But the only person that can truly convince you of this is YOU. And in order to convince yourself, you’re going to have to do the ONE thing you’ve been avoiding doing: You’re going to have to WRITE YOUR BOOK.”


Get Fulfilled – Write Your Book


Along with my Higher Power who I call God, and my children, writing my books has been the biggest joy of my life.


In addition to seeing how it transform others, it has also 100% transformed my life. I can’t wait to see how my second book is going to encourage other moms and grand moms to listen to their soul’s call, fire up their computers and WRITE LIKE A MOTHER.


Want Extra Support? I Coach!




Some of you mamas want a little extra help with writing, and there’s no shame in that! You can find my weekly blogs here, sign up for my mailing list here or find out more about my one-on-one book coaching services by contacting me at Andrea@AndreaFrazerWrites.com.



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